


Forever Rain

by seokgayysus



Category: Weak Hero (Webcomic)
Genre: Angst, Hurt No Comfort, Inspired by Music, Other, Reminiscing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-23
Updated: 2020-11-23
Packaged: 2021-03-10 03:33:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,191
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27676781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/seokgayysus/pseuds/seokgayysus
Summary: Gray misses Stephen, and rainy days are when he thinks of him the most.
Relationships: Stephen Ahn & Gray Yeon
Comments: 4
Kudos: 35





	Forever Rain

Gray woke up with a start, just as he always does on mornings like this. Gray always wakes up with a start at even the faintest of raindrops landing against the window in his room.

With that, he quickly sits up on his bed before looking at his window, sighing as his heartbeat slows from its initial racing before making the rare decision to lay back down. If it was a school day, Gray would have simply gotten up and gone to school earlier than he already does to study. 

Studying in school has always been a perfect distraction for the thoughts he avoids having. Studying at home just isn’t the same for Gray because being at home alone only reminds him that Stephen could be with him too, but isn’t and will never be. 

But it’s a Sunday morning, not a school day, so trying to distract himself with studying just won’t do. Gray could go jogging, or he could use the exercising band Ben gave him, but hearing the rain alone was enough to knock any motivation to gain muscle out of him. 

Rolling over onto his side, Gray reaches for his phone, immediately unlocking it to go to the weather app. He lets out another sigh when he sees the exact type of forecast that makes the next few days feel as heavy as he felt when he was dragged to a rooftop by Wolf Keum’s lackeys. 

Sunday will be rainy all day, but tomorrow, Monday, will have decent weather with clear skies. Most people would be happy to experience a great, clear day to hang out with friends or simply because they feel better after gloomy weather. 

But for Gray, he feels nothing but emptiness and dread from the memories of Stephen to enjoy nice weather after the rain. He would rather that it would rain again the next day, and the next, and for the rest of his days if it was possible. 

What sunshine means for others is what rain means to him. 

Because for Gray, the rain reminds him of the day before Stephen’s fall, the last time they got to talk to each other. But even then, Stephen did most of the talking and never got to know how much he means to him. 

While the rain haunts him because of what he never got to do, it’s also a comfort for him. It reminds him of when Stephen was still in his life despite the distance he tried putting between him and Gray. 

It’s the cloudless, sunshine-filled days that haunt Gray more painfully than rainy days. 

The reason for that is simple. Stephen was pushed off the roof on a beautiful day, followed by a day full of rain. 

Gray turns his phone off and pulls the covers over the rest of his body, curling up under its warmth that does nothing to comfort him. All he could do it bring his knees up to his chest and hold himself as memories he thought he made peace with are bombarding him painstakingly. 

Yes, he met people that he could call good friends now. There’s Eugene, his classmate that has stuck by his side and has shown him a type of kindness that he hasn’t experienced since Stephen.

There’s Ben, an incredibly strong person in more ways than just physically who Gray trusted with his past, and who has helped him in more ways than one several times. There’s Alex, Ben’s passionate best friend who has a big heart despite his toughness. 

There’s Gerard, who, despite being relatively private about his personal life and is all around laid back, is very dependable and a great person to be around. Rowan, Eugene’s friend from middle school, also became someone that Gray can consider his friend due to his unwavering determination to help and protect his friends. 

Gray can even consider Teddy a friend since he’s helped him and his friends on multiple occasions without having to. Gray is more than grateful to have met them and have them by his side when he never thought of making friends upon entering high school in the first place. 

But none of them fill the void in his heart like Stephen had. It’s not like the void he filled is entirely empty again because that would only be as such if Stephen never approached him that one day. 

But none of them make Gray feel like he felt whenever Stephen was around. That’s simply because none of them are Stephen, but their own people who have led their own lives. 

No one will ever replace Stephen for Gray because Stephen was extraordinary in an unexplainable way. Stephen gave him a purpose by helping him realize that life was more than studying and hoping to find a passion amongst it. 

Life was about living, and Stephen taught Gray how to live. It just pains Gray that Stephen, the person who taught him how to live, won’t be able to live his life like before, or at all. 

_ I miss you.  _ He thinks, feeling like he’s back in middle school, unwilling to leave his room or go to school because the person that filled the void in his heart is gone. 

It hurts Gray to force himself to realize how he’s felt all these months and realize that there will be days like these where what happened to Stephen hurts as if he just found out about it. Despite that, he wishes that it would rain forever.

If it rained forever, Gray would remember Stephen on that last day they talked to each other. He would be able to reminisce both happily and sadly at the many memories he had the privilege to share with someone as amazing as Stephen. 

Even if it’s futile, Gray likes to imagine the what-ifs because it’s in the what-ifs on rainy days before a sunny day that Gray can think of the alternatives where Stephen is still by his side. One of the many regrets he carries with him is not telling Stephen what he wanted to say that rainy day. 

So, under his blanket, despite how much it agonizes him, Gray lets his imagination go wild at all the what-ifs and what should have been. He thinks of what if he begged Stephen to ignore Oswald and Bryce that day of the Olympiad so they could’ve hung out as planned. 

He thinks of what if he confronted Bryce on his insecurities and how idiotic it is to take it out on anyone but himself. He thinks of what if he had told Stephen about the shit-talking Bryce did behind his back. 

He thinks of what if he had just told Stephen “no” on the day he urged them to sit and befriend Bryce. 

So much could be different if he had just done something to prevent all the pain and suffering Stephen went through. If only he was a hero to Stephen as Stephen was a hero to him. 

If only it would forever rain so Stephen could live as lively in Gray’s what-ifs just as he did before he lost him. 

**Author's Note:**

> I hope anyone who comes across this to read it enjoyed it!!


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